My mother is in town this weekend. Her hotel is close to my favorite movie theater. I’m working Saturday and I get out at seven. What would be better than to go to the movies with my mom on a Saturday night? But I can’t do that. While watching The Artist, I vowed not to go see another movie for at least two months. I’d say that’s a long enough period of abstinence.
Here’s my reasoning: Read more »
I expended a lot of friend-capital convincing my companions to go see this movie. This involved doing impressions of Mark Wahlberg saying “No es bueno” in his tough-guy doofus voice, as shown in the preview. Unfortunately, this was all for naught, since the movie is totally mediocre. Not good enough to be enjoyable on its own merits, not quite bad enough to laugh at.
Turns out the movie is a remake of an Icelandic film, Reykjavík-Rotterdam. I’m guessing the original is better. Or at least I hope it is. Anyways, the plot of the Marky Mark version centers around Chris Farraday, a home-security installer who used to be really good at hiding contraband while working on massive freight ships. He’s worked his way out, but due to his stone-cold stupid brother-in-law, he comes to owe money to Tim Briggs (Giovanni Ribisi), a local gangster. Ribisi is truly, startlingly bad. Worst of all, you can tell he thinks he’s doing a good job.
Other things that keep Contraband from being good, believable, or bearable Read more »
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