Where the Wild Things Are, review by Sameul Doob
Well I’m fresh out of the theater from Where The Wild Things Are. And what a relief it was, not just to pee, but to be done with the movie.
Wild Things was long. How long? Not that long. My cousin, with whom I saw it, said it would’ve been great had it been coupled with another children’s story movie – I suggested Spinky Sulks by William Steig – so the movie would have been half as long. I agreed.
What did I come away with? If your mom’s not paying enough attention to you, run away. When you come back, she’ll hug you twice and smile and gaze into your eyes right until the moment she falls asleep. And then you can eat your cake, smiling knowingly about what? Well about your experiences in the wild.
Maybe it’s I don’t have any heart. I get goosebumps. I got more goosebumps from the The Blind Side trailer with Sandra Bullock than I did during the goodbye scene with Max (main character) and the wild things. The ten minutes prior to Max’s leaving – it felt like ten minutes anyway – I spent whispering, “Go. Time to go, Max,” and waved my fingers at the screen like I was lazily combating a mosquito. Why, you ask, if you’re reading this, did I want Max out of the land of wild things? Maybe it’s because I’ve seen too many action movies, or I was taught in college about the three act structure. Or maybe, again, it’s that my heart’s sole purpose is to pump blood and I’ve lost anything resembling feelings. But Christ was it boring where the wild things were. How many times can a boy – onscreen – have fun? He runs into the rising sun; he makes plans aloud to build a fort; he participates in a dirt ball fight; he rolls down a big hill. You know? Conversely, he’s sad, sad, sad. (Maybe this was why I got sick of babysitting.) The wild things, see, have problems, too: emotional, psychological, not enough to do. They’re sad and they’re bored and a similar looking couple in their group is broke up. So Max is going to fix this, as their king. But he can’t, basically, so he leaves. And it’s in his leaving and everyone’s collective sadness that brings the estranged couple (or brother and sister, I’m not sure) back together again. So why didn’t he just leave earlier, I say! And anyway I didn’t buy the happy ending for those two. It was all of three or four shots: too quick a fix for how long the movie felt. It was like in Pretty in Pink, where Duckie gets a girl, any girl! at the very end.
I wouldn’t say this movie is a failure. It had its moments. It was just too precious. (Part of the reason I can’t watch Edward Scissorhands anymore.) Example: the lead wild thing (voiced by James Gandolfini) had made a model where everything was as he wished it to be. There were peaks made of sticks and there were carved figurines resembling the wild things, obviously. Then Max put his head through a hole in the middle of the model’s base and the wild thing poured water and a little canoe floated by Max’s entranced face.
I don’t need that. Also, I should say, the music had the largest part in the precious thing.
